Consent is like a castle.
In the castle, everyone is having enjoyable sexytimes.
However, the castle is surrounded by a moat.
And the moat is on fire.
The moat is embarrassment and awkwardness.
You have to cross the moat of awkwardness (by asking consent) to get into the fun castle where all the fun sexytimes are happening.
Suck it up and cross the moat.
(Adapted from Peter Strom’s metaphor for awkwardness and swing dancing)
Sexual assault is selfish and if a person does it, they do not truly love and respect the person they’re with.
It’s selfish, because it’s putting one’s own “needs” above someone else’s safety and well-being. It’s selfish because the person would rather avoid a potentially awkward moment than make sure their “loved one” does not have their boundaries crossed.
Love is not selfish. Love is respectful. Love is putting someone else’s needs over one’s own. If they truly loved me, they never would’ve risked hurting me.
Sarah Super speaks about ways to support and empower survivors of sexual assault and rape by offering choices in a trauma sensitive way.
“Consent needs to be about making it just as easy to say no as it is to say yes.”