It’s been five months since I’ve had what’d I’d call a disruptive “PTSD” episode. Five months since an episode has thrown me off for more than a few seconds. I don’t understand. What’s going on!?!? This is blowing my mind! I literally never thought this would happen. I never dared hope that I’d arrive at a place where I could be mostly free from the shackles of almost-mental illness.
I like to talk about mental illness on this blog and my personal struggles with mental health. But let’s be clear: I’m not technically mentally ill. I’m in a weird gray area, because I have symptoms of PTSD but it’s not serious enough for a diagnosis. Recently I found out that there’s an unofficial name for this: subthreshold PTSD. Continue reading Subthreshold PTSD
I got so used to always having a low level of anxiety that it feels really weird (in a good way) to have that almost entirely gone. For the first time in months, I feel very “me” again. I’m relaxed. I’m taking joy in the little things. I’m overly excited about learning anything new. I’m laughing a lot. I don’t take as long to calm down. I’m not thinking about the past much anymore. I’m not getting triggered often or experiencing many intrusive thoughts… I wish this could last forever. Continue reading So This is What “Normal” Feels Like