When Rape Jokes Get Personal

Trigger warning: rape jokes, belittling rape, general asshol-ery

It was the last night of my band/choir tour. We had spent spring break in New Orleans, mostly enjoying the sights and occasionally adding to the almost constant music that filled the air. On the way back, we made a stop in Nashville. I was walking up Broadway with three other guys.

We walked past a dark, creepy looking alley. It looked seriously sketchy. Then, one of the guys had the nerve to suggest that I see how far I can walk down it until someone tries to rape me.

He was serious. He genuinely wanted me to try this.

Naturally I was horrified and didn’t find it even remotely funny. “But we’ll all come and save you,” he said. “It’ll be fine. It’s be funny.” I was pissed. Plus, the two other guys didn’t do a great job backing me up. The were clearly uncomfortable about the idea, but didn’t really say much to dissuade him. Eventually I was able to convince this asshole to stop trying, but I wasn’t able to convince him that attempted rape is not hilarious.

In retrospect, I wish I would’ve told my choir teacher. Sure, people would’ve accused me of overreacting, but maybe my teacher would’ve been able to convince this piece of shit that rape is never funny and that trying to convince someone to risk getting raped on a school trip is not even remotely acceptable.

This is rape culture folks. This is textbook rape culture: when rape is so prevalent and normalized that people don’t even take it seriously sometimes.

Thanks for reading this article. My full story about surviving and thriving after multiple experiences with sexual assault can be found here. And as a note, the story in this article is set almost a year after the first time I was sexually assaulted.


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