I’m a female in my 20’s and am from the American Midwest. I’m a heathcare professional, a feminist, a scientist, a musician, a swing dancer, a dreamer, and a million other irrelevant things.
Oh yeah, and I’m a survivor of multiple sexual assaults.
So why am I making this blog? To be honest, I’m not entirely sure yet. I already have a journal. Maybe this’ll be a good way to organize my thoughts in one spot. Or better yet, maybe it can help you recover, help you help someone who is recovering, or allow you to better understand what life is like as a survivor.
Here goes nothing.
My Story (TLDR version at the bottom)
Trigger warning: descriptions of sexual assault.
Turning eighteen felt pretty good, as it does for most people. For me, it meant celebrating my biggest accomplishment to date: learning to cope with the severe anxiety brought on by my parents’ divorce which began the previous year. It meant starting a new life with my mom after watching her being verbally abused ever since I can remember. It was a time of growth for both of us.
It was also a time of fear. I was afraid my severe anxiety would come back. I was afraid that I would repeat my parents’ mistakes by either becoming my father or marrying someone like him. Mostly it was a time of determination, because I was doing everything in my power to make sure those fears wouldn’t become a reality even though the odds were against me in both respects. Because of my parents, I learned that respect is the most important thing in a relationship. I knew that because of what I saw my parents go through, I would demand respect in every relationship and show them the door if that didn’t happen.
Well… that didn’t quite go the way I planned. Continue reading My Background and Story
Sexually Assaulting Your Dental Hygienist is a Bad Idea. My Instruments are Sharp.
Sexually Assaulting Your Dental Hygienist is a Bad Idea. Part II: Reporting
Well, just a week after reporting what happened, my workplace has already resolved the issue better than I ever could’ve imagined. Apparently yesterday my practice manager, a lady from HR and the patient’s doctor met to discuss how to respond. I suppose it would’ve been best to include me, but I don’t mind. They ended up creating a great plan of action that I’m very satisfied with. Continue reading Sexually Assaulting Your Dental Hygienist is a Bad Idea. Part III: The Response
Please read this post first for the background.
Trigger warning: sexual assault
After the creep’s appointment, I ran into my coworker (another hygienist) in the sterilization room. I briefly expressed relief that the appointment was over. “He was such a creep!” I said. She was immediately concerned and asked what happened. I answered vaguely about him testing my boundaries and then went on with my day.
Honestly, I feel bad for the rest of my patients. For the rest of the night, I was angry, anxious and quiet. I feel bad for the rest of my patients because I was a little distant/disconnected. I couldn’t stop thinking about how awful he made me feel and what I should do about it. Continue reading Sexually Assaulting Your Dental Hygienist is a Bad Idea. Part II: Reporting
Oh my gosh… my first clickbait title… What have I become? If you clicked on this article because you think that I stabbed my patient for sexually assaulting me, you are in the wrong place. I wouldn’t even consider it. I did, however, do one of the fastest cleanings of my life to get that creep out of my chair. But let’s rewind… Continue reading Sexually Assaulting Your Dental Hygienist is a Bad Idea. My Instruments are Sharp.
I seriously haven’t posted a true blog in two months? What??? But here’s the thing: if I’m not posting, it means I haven nothing to complain about, so life is good. I graduated four months ago and have been working in the dental field for three months. My job is fantastic. The Prozac is still fucking life changing and I’m in love with it. I don’t even have side effects as far as I can tell.
But I digress. The title of this post is “My Childhood was Traumatic… I Guess”. The story is this: I was just watching a video about how childhood trauma negatively affects a person’s health throughout their life. Let’s not get into the details because that’s depressing… However, it got me thinking that yes, by their standards my childhood was traumatic. The first time I was sexually assaulted, I was too young to even remember it. Plus, I witnessed domestic abuse for the first 18 years of my life.
Here’s the strange thing: At the time, I didn’t think it was traumatic or stressful overall. Continue reading My Childhood was Traumatic… I Guess